Experts & Views
The happy times are here !!!
No I am not talking about the boring court vacations which the litigation lawyers are so upbeat about but I am talking about the Mumbai monsoons !! those living outside Mumbai reading this blog probably don’t realize the bliss that we Mumbaikars get in watching the rains...this is the time when we relieve ourselves from the cruel and harsh heat and forget all our problems and just enjoy the weather.....and of course this is also the season when not so hardworking lawyers go on a vacation to exotic destinations with their families and .............errrrr ............girlfriends........not to mention that we associates make it possible for our senior partners and partners to have fun.........how ???? of course we do the hard work....we work our asses out 16 hours a day......we punish ourselves by reading boring documents/agreements through those 16 hours....we torture our brains with senseless and insane regulations and laws ...we raise hefty invoices with the clients showing all sorts of inflated billable hours....sometimes the invoices run more than 50 pages....longer than the agreements that we draft or vett....we put an additional couple of hours to explain to the client as to how that magical figure in the invoice was arrived at that he/she is staring......in that process we double up as chartered accountants as well (damn we are multi talented)...we become recovery agents to recover the money and then at the end of it all our brainless and horny senior partners and partners get to have all the fun !!!
I have never been able to figure out the role of senior partners and partners in a law firm...seriously whats their contribution to law firms apart from browsing through documents that we so painstakingly prepare and finding stupid faults with commas and full stops and staring at hot females who are handpicked by them for employment as lawyers...at the end of the financial year we don’t even get our due in the form of bonuses or increments and instead we learn that these fools have taken off to exotic destinations and we just funded their trip !!!
My boss loves to travel round the globe with his trophy wife (sometimes hired girlfriends, you know what I mean) on the pretext of client meetings..last time I went to his cabin for a hike and he shooed me away as if I was a stray dog who just entered his house to steal a morsel.. next thing I learn is that he and his trophy wife has left for a famous international holiday spot and his wife spends a fortune for her beauty treatments....not only that I learnt later on from a reliable source later on that he spent a fortune on girls hired locally while his wife was away..........
The other partners are no good....they fly off with their girlfriends/wives as well and thanks to the generosity of our senior partner they get to take their kids too (great!!! why do you leave the servants out...sponsor them as well)..that’s not it !!!! the fun part comes next...that time of the year for these mindless senior partners and partners when their bank balance gets a sudden jump (a jump that will put even poor Mario to shame)...the firm earns a huge profit and partners get a piece of the pie.....thats just great !!!
According to my careful analysis of the situation ...the lawyers working in law firms have become more like prostitutes...you get laid while the bosses get to keep the money.......uhhhhh god damn just forget it...let me just enjoy the birds and the bees and the rains.......:)....enjoy guys !!!!!
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1. The author is not that old in the profession - many lawyers in law firms become thick skinned within a year or two to tolerate this and many other things which are pretty common.
2. The exchange of sexual favours is relatively less or lets say, minuscule in law firms when compared with the corporate sector, where its a way of life and existence.
3. Mr. phasgaya: Thats why they are called partners - they take a share in the profits of the firm and you are a retainer - you are retained so that you can work, bill, earn and recover the money. You have little to worry though - in a few years, you'll move on from being the slut/prostitute to a mature pimp (read, partner) and you will have people like your present self working for you - this is how it always works. :-) :-) (add an evil laugh)
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