PS: This is not to hurt the sentiments of anyone, this should be read as a humorous reading and often I love to express my rights given by the Constitution of India.

I was thinking one day that how economics plays an important role and how it is related to our everyday life and in each decision we make. My economics teacher always emphasis on to look and think in innovative ways how economics is closely related to our life, suddenly I realised how the laws of economics are closely related to how most boys think about love and girls reciprocate in a market of love. As most of the laws of economics is based on assumptions and taking all things as constant, a lot of assumptions need to be made while going through this tutorial. Hope it would be fun and quite informative while reading this.

To begin with consider that the market of love is a open market (i.e., there is no monopoly by a single individual, God can only help if there is a Greek-god in your class or college with lot of bucks in his pocket) with a fair competition (Can’t help if someone with muscle power (Seniorus Bikerboyidae in Folly Nariman's words) tries to get hold of beautiful angels (Fresherus Hotnessa again in Folly Nariman's words ) in your class). So, to start with let’s see what Karl Marx, the great economist says about society and how money is important in our life.

Marxian Analysis of Love: The society is based on two things, the economic base and the superstructure (all other things in society). The super structure is depended on the economic base. Inother words, the whole story of finding and keeping a love is dependent on the money you have.

The law of supply of love states that higher is money more is the supply (getting a beautiful babe), i.e., money is directly related to money.

Similarly, the law of demand of love states that the higher is the price (the amount of money a boy needs to spend), lower is the demand for that girl, as even though many people want to date but don’t have the means to get her. But, there are exceptions to the law of demand; it is not pplicable for those girls who are considered to be symbol of status. Some, girls are extremely damn beautiful (read Fresherus Hotnessa), boys are ready to pay almost anything to get her love as they are considered to be a symbol of status among their peers and the benefit is your confidence level goes up while you see others feeling jealous when you are with her. For, those girls my advice is try to get whatever you can, you hold a monopoly and you have the power to make decisions.

However, there is law of diminishing marginal utility works; it works in the either way for a boy and a girl as well. Utility is nothing but the psychological satisfaction derived. The law of diminishing marginal utility, states that more and more of a thing we get, the intensity of our desire for that thing tends to diminish. Once, a boy start spending more and more, at a point the satisfaction the girl was getting from the gifts gets diminished. Similarly, once a boy start getting  more from the girl after a point he will not get the satisfaction he earlier used to get. So, it is equally important for both the boy and girl maintain the balance otherwise the fun would soon be over.

There is nothing to hide that girls love money and to be praised, so money constitutes an important part in love. No money, no love. There are four factors of love which determines your level of success in love, they are as follows:

Four Factors of Love: Money (K), Physical attributes (P), Intelligence (I), your own creative touch (C)

There is a direct relationship between the physical inputs (K, P, I, C) and outputs (mental and physical benefits, I have explained that while explaining the psychology part at last) obtained from employment of these inputs. This functional relationship is known as production function of love. 

The law of return will explain the change in output as a result of change in input. In a short run, the only thing you can increase or decrease is the amount of money you have and spend on your girl friend other things over a long run may be changed but by that time you  develop those skills, you will lose her. A tip, try to find someone is of the same or below your economic status of living or you may soon become a bankrupt spending all your bucks on a rich babe. The utility (the psychological satisfaction derived) from spending will not be reached.

In a short run, the law of variable proportion works, which states that ‘if more and more unitsof variable factor are employed with fixed factors, total physical product (TPP) (literally, pun intended) increases at an increasing rate in the beginning, then increases at a diminishing rate and finally start falling’.

In the first phase known as stage of increasing returns, TPP increases at an increasing rate with increase in inputs (gifts and expensive dates). In the first few days, you can easily move on to see-each other stage to holding hands and you proceed to holding her waist with inputs obviously. The marginal physical product (MPP i.e., the addition to the total output (benefit) from an extra unit of input) keeps on rising and reaches its highest.

The second phase, or stage of diminishing return the TPP increases at a slower rate and MPP starts falling. In this stage you will find that though there may be a possibility of moving on to a kiss, to a smooch and further. The rate of progress would be slow. Keep your patience, though you will notice inspite of gifts you are not making quick progress like earlier stages, hold on let the relationship grow.

The third phase, or stage of declining returns, in this the TPP starts declining, even after gifts you are not getting what you want. This is the stage, when most of the clashes start as one starts expecting more from the partner and no one getting satisfied, ultimately the relationship falls apart. My advice: Never expect anything in love.

Most of the relationships stay intact in the second stage, as in the first stage, you are trying to achieve something more and in the third stage, MPP is negative and TPP is falling. In second stage, most of the couples have a bit of understanding and realise this stage. So, neither be too slow, nor be too fast, just maintain the equilibrium situation.

Law of Diminishing Return: In a short run relationship, more employment of variable input (spending) can ultimately led to lesser output or the marginal benefit diminishes. As one of the factors may be changed (money) in a short run, other factors (suppose your muscles) may not be changed, so spending (K) too much may not improve the boy’s chance of getting better benefit. This may happen due the efficient combination is falling out, (you have to spend more to hide your physical or other deficiencies) or may be your quantity of fixed factors have become less compared to your variable factors (your physical attribute is so low, that you might have to spend more than what you have spent earlier to impress her, by this time she must have known your weak point but you are helpless.) As, both must have the same level of satisfaction and there is compromise between the two.

Another tip for boys, girls love to be praised and appreciated. However, if they look good, don’t compliment their looks, they know how good they are, otherwise you wouldn’t have been going around and spending, better compliment their intellect later on in the conversation, like “ that’s really original” or, “I haven’t heard that point of view before” Before she takes off in another direction, finish the conversation with “ nice meeting you, it’s rare meeting someone (insert one of these here): Originally insightful, With interesting experiences, Who make their own opinions, With good taste, As well cultured as you, With their own theories”, etc. This shows that you are quite creative and your level of intelligence. On the other hand, if your woman is with an average looks, you may want to compliment them for their choice of clothes, their hairstyle or whatever it is that does look good about her, like may be her voice or smile. Please don’t over-state, be on the safe-side.

Once, both have started seeing each other and dating, and you have already started investing, let’s explain the cost-benefit analysis of this relationship from a boy’s psychology and insight.

· A boy spends money on a girl as a capital investment to reap profit in future.

· The more is the spending on good capital resources (gifts and expensive dates) better is

chance of getting good output or profit.

· The time one spend, feel good and gets excited is what the break-even point of love, if

one is not finding minimum level of satisfaction for his spending he is actually making

loss, and would not like to continue the relationship.

· The moment you get a kiss is what you have started making profit.

· The moment you get into her, is what you have started making super-normal profit and

hit the jackpot.

· And if you could not succeed, it is your bad-debt. The whole investment on capital was a

wrong calculation and lack of efficient management. Let’s try the luck somewhere else.

Now, let’s analyse what going on in a girl’s mind and why they love money more than anything.

· A girl thinks that the boy must be economically sound and can prove to be a good hubby

in future (economically sound).

· More spending shows that his capability to maintain her lifestyle in future.

· Mental satisfaction is the main thing, the girl thinks her break-even point of love, she

feels good but also the amount of gifts obtained plays an important role.

· When a girl gets emotional, she might give a kiss or might be having a plan to get more

gifts from you. Girls are too complex to understand. It’s like a gamble you might hit the

jackpot or be debt ridden.

· This is where, emotions plays a lot than money but it matters as well. Love for boys is a

means to achieve sex which is the ultimate goal. But girls think sex as a means to achieve

stronger relationship as a goal. She might give you a chance, when she feels financially

safe and secure from your side.

· He was just a fool, she played the way around. She gets “I am the winner” feeling. Now

she will try another fool who can pay her bills.

Fresherus Timidus your first semester course of micro-economics is over. You can now happily sit in the end sem.