Mr.Henpecked Humblepie was in the middle of a tiresome day at work, when he started musing over his Lady Love…"it’s been a while since she called me…why is that? …surely , I can’t have wronged her?…I would’ve known - …the ritual hurling of kettles and rolling pins wasn’t there this morning"…then , it struck…it had been a year to the day he tied the knot - the realization brought with it a tidal wave of fear-one that threatened to render him motionless for the rest of the day.An hour later , having recovered from the very potent bout of trepidation, he wrote a letter.His Lawyerly Love , he hoped, would abate the storm that was to follow once he reached home…and writing a letter was just the right thing to do…for, it spares one the possibility of a verbal assault, that could , ever-so-often , turn violent.Once at home (read battleground) , he sensed the palpable wrath - so much so , that he could’ve knifed through it.With not so much as a squeal , he handed out the letter -quivering with rage , she read it :
A P O L O G I A
“Forgiveness is the fragrance that the violet sheds on the heel that has crushed it.”- Mark Twain. "Before I proceed to elaborate on the “whys” and the “wherefores” of my criminal lapse, dated the 10th of June 2009, I implore you to condone the same. The realization struck me while I was at work ; the aftermath of this realization, coupled with the gravity of my crime, took its toll; - it included , inter alia , an inability to muster the courage required to call you. My guilt-ridden conscience was reeling even as I tried to cope with what was arguably a most appalling memory lapse - my penchant for memory lapses notwithstanding. My understanding of your course of action, in the light of my apology , allows me to afford a presumption ; - that of absolution ; - which leaves us with the million dollar, nay, the gazillion dollar question - why did it happen?. The reasons for the crime include, but isn’t limited to : 1.An all-consuming work ethic. 2.A not-so-pleasant job profile. 3.Lack of an optimal sleep ethic. 4.Fallibility ; - temerarious as it sounds, my birth right as a human being. I hope this answers most, if not all, of your queries insofar as my oversight is concerned. Once again, I beseech you to forgive me.” She then stared at him - for what seemed like eternity - and her face gradually broke into a smile.The letter had its desired effect.Priding himself on the wordsmith that he was, our hero gently clasped her hand - and took her out for dinner.