It hurts, it really really hurts (like getting your ass pinched by a professional wrestler in the Delhi metro) to look back and see how the sweet innocent language that I spoke in law school has taken devilish meanings after I started working. My job (I feel) had the same effect on my language as watching Japanese hentai – complete bastardisation of the tongue and mind.
Here are some examples for you:
Word | Then (In law school) | Now (at the job) |
Deal | “Ok, pakka deal hai, this Saturday Old Monk rum and coke at Pecos.” | “Popat, has the deal fallen through or are they still re-negotiating the commercials?” |
Bandwidth | “Oh ho, these college people, cant they get a ISP with good bandwidth?” | “Hey Popat, if you have some bandwith can you find some Supreme Court Judgement on...” |
Project
| “Did you submit your Constitutional Law project on time?” | “When do you go for the diligence to Mumbai for Project Marimba?” |
Closing
| “Oye Popat, run and come fast, the hostel doors are closing” | “Popat, make sure all the CP’s have been adhered to prior to closing.” |
Pitch | “Popat, pitch the ball short. We 3rdyear guys have to win this match.” | “Popat, we are pitching in for the deal on derivatives, please ensure that you are well read.” |
Party | “Yahoo!, exams over, party time.” | “…VIP Macho and Lux Cozy are hereinafter individually referred to as the “Party” and collectively as the…” |
Best Friend | “Billoo is turning out to be my best friend. We even share our undies these days” | “Kian, believe me Bombay High Court judgment has nothing to do with ‘best friend’ relationships.” |
Black-berry | “Popat, he hit you right where it hurts the most, look your Berries have turned Black!” | “Damn Blackberry keeps ringing off the hook, God, help me out of this flurry of e-mails” |
Agree? Disagree? If you know any other similar words, write ‘em here.
[p.s. the (nerdy) purists don’t get mad at this post, smile a little and you may do some good to yourself!]
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