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But hear me out, I made it to NALSAR this year, an achievement I would have been quite proud of if it was 2020 or 2019. This was my third attempt. I finally made it to NALSAR, but at the cost of spending my 2 years in two different universities, paying them with my time and my money.
That does not concern me now though, attending the classes, interacting with the faculty and the quality of work expected from us, I can observer substantial difference in the kind of academic rigour that my last two institutions demanded vs NALSAR.
But I cannot help but compare myself with everyone in my high-school. Most of these people are not even law, and a couple of those who are, are into local colleges of my city, whose name you won't even have heard if you aren't from this city. ( I am aware the last line comes out as condescending but please excuse me, I am compensating for my low self-esteem here )
I just find it embarrassing that while my friends pursuing BA are almost done with their UG degrees or my engineering friends are in their penultimate year, I am here starting from scratch. Hell, even my friends in local law colleges are in their 3rd year, meaning they are done with the BA subjects in their syllabus. And here I am as a fresher at NALSAR at the age of 20.
I like it here at NALSAR, I like it very much, but comparison is a thief of joy, I am aware but I cannot help.
The time I have lost, continues to be a mental thorn and though travel as a cure for discontent is not a viable solution but I just wish the college reopens soon and I can get away from this city, finally make it away from these people that matter so less in my life and yet I keep attaching yardsticks to, to determine my self-worth.
While you should cherish and rejoice your achievement, some of the sentences above reflect your state of mind than anything else.
The truth is, you are at a good place at your own chosen pace. Could you have achieved great things in other unis you were despite them not being academically rigorous? - possibly, yes. Is it guaranteed that the NALSAR tag will allow you to rest on your laurels during and after college is over? - unequivocally, no. A few years down the line, would it matter that you started Uni two years late? - plausibly, no. So what is it that you should feel good about, and what should you be vary off?
For starters, don't disregard the two years you have spent at Unis which may not be top Unis based on flawed metrics used by us to gauge the success of Unis. It is true, that NALSAR like NLS, NUJS, NLUD would give you a boost in terms of how people perceive you, but that is the extent of your advantage. The real benefit of being in any "top" University, at least in India is - the peer to peer learning is significantly higher, access to a well established and connected alumni base and opportunities (premised on lots of self motivation) which may be relatively easier to get. These are cogent benefits and a good reason to have dropped two years depending you can financially afford it. Purely in terms of academic rigour, you would probably have a handful of professors whose courses if you pursue may significantly impact you. Other than that, most NLU faculty is on a whole average barring maybe NLS. If you are vested with self motivation, keep your grades high ish (top 10-20 of your batch) and tick the right boxes (few publications, few conferences, roles in societies, possibly a TA, maybe add a moot or two and finish with some debating for seasoning) you can extract a lot from the NALSAR tag. Keep in mind that most, if not all of these activities are overwhelming and their would be people who seem significantly better than you but also know that is mostly because of their existing privilege and 5 years is a long time to pick these skills up and truly excel.
A top tier law firm job is a given, in fact if your grades are decent at the end of your 6th semester - don't waste time even interning at these places. Keep them as a last resort.
Coming to self worth and comparison with friends - You will not see it now, but at the end of let's say your third or fourth year when your friends (unless they too have a sense of self consciousness, which I earnestly hope they do) would be doing jobs which are menial and have little to no connection with their degrees. I only hope I don't have to explain the situation which befalls an average engineering graduates, to you so I am not entering that. You at this time, would have significantly engaged with the law, you would have doors open to pursue jobs which would be meaningful and would drive you, your friends would envy your command over being able to discuss and talk on anything under the sun (they might not be well aware with how law students faff).
At the end of it self worth is something which can be down at the tallest of places, NALSAR notwithstanding. Work on it. Introspect, why you feel low - is it just age? do you feel your friends are more successful? and also consider what exactly your idea of success is, and is there space to engage with it critically. Law school, specially the better ones (not based on academic rigor, brilliant faculties or any other bogus standard but the degree of freedom it allows students) can be a rewarding place. It can be cruel, yes. It probably will be, but the reasons for that will not be your age.
Avoid plagiarism at all costs, no matter how poor your writing skills presently are. They will be better. Cultivate empathy towards yourself, and remember to help another when you can. Lastly, remember -
"All that is gold does not glitter,
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost.
From the ashes a fire shall be woken,
A light from the shadows shall spring;
Renewed shall be blade that was broken,
The crownless again shall be king."
This was hilarious, one of the cutest jokes I've heard, don't know if it was deliberately written as a sarcasm on the post college prospects of law grads or what, but laughed my teeth out.
As some folks have mentioned in this thread, the two years you think you've 'lost' will seem like nothing once you graduate and work towards achieving what you define for yourself as success.
Remember, we may all be in the same sea but we are each in different boats. Double down, row as hard as you can, and you will get to where you're destined to end up, exactly when you need to be.
https://www.legallyindia.com/convos/topic/199453-Is-a-2nd-drop-advisable-Please-help-me-#comments
- R