Logically this makes sense, sure. But this is the most roundabout way of living life I’ve seen. One should go fracture their arm so that eventually when it heals they will appreciate having all functioning limbs more?

Please don’t deliberately seek out a high stress/toxic team, you may appreciate everything that comes after it because your standards would be on the floor, but the physical and psychological set back would be immense. Getting put through the wringer can impair you and your confidence, which is perhaps one of the most important factors to survive in this space.

Suffering does not always equal growth.

“The same water that softens the potato, hardens the egg”

There is a simple way to ensure life is not absolutely terrible.

An easy trajectory is join which ever law firm team you get and in maybe 15 months, once you have some experience move to a very high pressure high performing team. Push yourself for the next two / 2.5 years. Learn as much as you can. For that time do sacrifice the work life balance. After that, research the good teams, the ones with nice people and moderately decent work and move there. Grow with that team and don’t move out till you make partner. You will appreciate good decent people after the ringer with the high pressure team. Your work hours will automatically be better. And you would have learnt how to manage deliverables in a short span that you would now have time for other things in life.

@T1 Junior Partner - Sir / Ma'am I come from non-nlu nd purely litigation experience . Pls suggest a way to join a corporate law firm . should I drop such hopes ? Can I get to where you are right now ? pls help

I don't think one can really do something about it since you are easily replaceable, both by the firm & the client. Slack once and you get dropped is what I had seen happen to my bosses at the very early stage of my career, giving me more flavour of how essential it is to constantly stay on your toes every day and at any given point of time. Law firms require hardwork and long hours which comes with a lot of stress, anxiety and other medical problems. That being said, its important to make peace with the fact you cannot - please everybody in your team, cope up with unrealistic deadlines, cheat the client for inflated billing and always make time for your family/friends. Your life starting from being an A0 to rising up the ranks would always trigger responsibility alongside the pressure to perform given how you will have to justify your payband at the higher levels. I think its key to stick with a good set of people and try to outperform yourself and others every single day; which is the only flawed criterion to succeed at firms. Lastly, find something to look forward to when things get difficult - for some people it may be family and for some material possessions/more work. Keep an open mind and try to be kind to all. Life is always going to be difficult moving forward, who said it would be easy anyways!

Thank you for such honest answer. How much of the issues have you been able to address now, wholly or partly? And what all things you made peace with? What was easy / difficult?

And this is for everyone, not only for the above. Please also mention what you did about it, how much you succeeded and what are the things you accepted. Let's share this as well.

Felt like I had a lot to prove since I didn't really study much in college. Most of the folks who are in my boat still land comparisions with their batch toppers working in the same/rival firm, that begins from law school itself i.e. getting jealous over who gets to which position, pay, car and the list goes on and on. Regret treating my juniors badly when the deadlines were tight, a lot of who've left while some stayed. Swore to stay true to my craft and take my team out on dinners more often than not, now that I am in a position to do so. In all, Indian biglaw comes with a lot of bullshit where neglecting mental wellbeing and familytime is glorified for the sake of closing the marquee deals which come to us from time to time. Wish I could have done something different but I love the learning curve which my area of practice brings. Money is great (north of 70 lakhs) but you can never compensate for the bridges you have burnt along the way - this sometimes includes your parents, close friends and colleagues. I wish I could openly talk about these things with the fresh batch of interns which exude very high ambititions; without knowing the darker side to what goes through a partner's mind (and heart).

Looking forward to more perspectives on this amazing question!

Lawyers who are now partners (made partnership recently) who prioritised work over everything else (friends, family, hobbies, exercise and sleep). Do you regret anything? Is it worth putting work over everything else for the first 10 years of your career? Does your personal life recover from the 10 years of de-prioritisation, or given your success, does it matter if your personal life doesn't recover? What does life look like at say, 35 when you place work over everything else in your 20s? Looking for views from people on both sides. Sorry about the rambling question. Bad day.