I'm at a tier one NLU, my roommate has been suicidal for some time. Recently I saw numerous cuts on her hand-- a clear sign of self-harm. What to do? My college isn't very supportive of mental health issues, and she hails from a sexually abusive family.
This is risk in case your mail is not kept private or the recipient gets angry, but you can write an email to the VC or the faculty member in charge of your hostel and tell them that you fear for her life and that you think that the institution should find her care or support on an urgent basis. You can say that you have read about law school suicides in the past and that you want to make sure to highlight the need for intervention before anything tragic and irreversible happens. You should also add that sending her back to her family will probably endanger her so the institution should try to find her a professional who can help her. If you put it in writing they may help out of fear of a future PR problem.
hi, i'm convinced this will backfire rather badly given that OP has said that their college is not supportive of mental health. privacy is an important concern, too
Hence the caution. OP may be wrong in her assessment. A lot of schools are lazy and can't be bothered what they see as snowflakes, but will move very fast if it is a suicide risk. And if they are notified in writing, they know that there is a record and they can be sued if anything happens later which means that if they have any sense, they will act. Even doctors are allowed to violate privacy if anyone's life is under threat. I'm shocked at the number of people suggesting that this is OP's burden to carry. There is no way she is equipped to deal with this.
@OP: If you can reveal the NLU that you are from, I may be able to suggest the name of the faculty who can and will help. Just mention the state or other hints.
ofcourse your college doesn't care about these things.. I'm glad for the post which has shared the names of the profs who may be able to help you. I understand you aren't in a position to help too much yourself, it shouldn't have been your job, and it's great that you are trying to help even this much. Let's hope your college education does not rob you off whatever empathy you have left, rather helps you get more, seeing the misery around you. Law schools, and law in general, tends to rob us of our humanity :(
You should try and get her to become spiritually inclined. She should ideally find peace in religion and remembrance of the almighty.
It will be a very difficult path for her to walk alone. If possible, you should support her through it.
Given her history of family abuse, she won’t necessarily open up completely to you or anyone else. Accept that fact and be patient with her.
You will ask why do you have to bear this, just remember that by being placed in her path, you might actually become the reason why she doesn’t mortally harm herself.
Sorry to say this but that first paragraph is utter bullshit. What's to say that OP's roommate isn't already religious or spiritual? Besides, you seem to be implying that people who are irreligious are through only ones who are capable of being depressed or suicidal. Even if she was irreligious, having her suddenly develop belief in the almighty would be far less helpful than making actual mental health and counselling services available to her. I do agree though with the rest of your answer about how if it's possible for her, OP should support her through this tough time in her life.
Writer of the comment above here, I'd like to ask everyone who reads this to ignore the last part of my comment. As mentioned otherwise in this thread, this is not OP's burden to bear necessarily and it's wrong to put undue expectations or otherwise onto them.
This is above your pay grade. Whatever is happening to her is far too complex for you to step in and help her by herself. You’re just a college student.
Whatever you might think about the profs and administration in your university. You can be sure that they are adults who have seen this several times before. So you should notify the authorities. You should tell them everything you know and suspect and let them figure it out. It’s really the only thing to do.
Don’t let idiots on here tell you to offer her counselling yourself ( you’re not a therapist) or to keep mum and say nothing because privacy ( there is no right to privacy when you might harm yourself or others).
I am not a very empathetic person but her miserable situation made me post this and ask for advice. I could not even get proper sleep because of her late-night mental breakdowns.
How is the tier of your NLU relevant for this post? Do you go to the washroom or sleep with a placard saying you're from a tier one NLU? It is so comical to see people carrying such badges of honour these days!
She has got such rights, sure. Others have got a right to mock that. You have got a right to express your displeasure at the mocking. It's a veritable rights-fest here.
the university will take action
It will be a very difficult path for her to walk alone. If possible, you should support her through it.
Given her history of family abuse, she won’t necessarily open up completely to you or anyone else. Accept that fact and be patient with her.
You will ask why do you have to bear this, just remember that by being placed in her path, you might actually become the reason why she doesn’t mortally harm herself.
Take care and I hope she perseveres through this.
Whatever you might think about the profs and administration in your university. You can be sure that they are adults who have seen this several times before. So you should notify the authorities. You should tell them everything you know and suspect and let them figure it out. It’s really the only thing to do.
Don’t let idiots on here tell you to offer her counselling yourself ( you’re not a therapist) or to keep mum and say nothing because privacy ( there is no right to privacy when you might harm yourself or others).
There is a deep spiritual reason behind her being in your environment.
Don't judge her - suport her like anything.
2. Even if you had been what you claimed, I don't really care. Law firms or their people don't hold any special place of honour for me.
3. Unlike you, I don't like to parade my credentials, academic or professional. Both are way beyond your station.