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An estimated 2-minute read

Litigator Husband “Smelly, But Very Very Sexy”, Admits Wife As Judge Refuses Divorce

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In a recent Delhi HC decision Justice Kapoor denied divorce to the wife of a very less known litigator Mr. Smelly Singh on grounds of cruelty. The wife, Mrs. Rosy had contended that the ‘unbearable and nauseating smell’ which her husband emanated after coming from work amounted to ‘cruelty’.

Facts: prima facie stinking

Litigators in India are to compulsorily wear black coats and black pants even in the months of May and June and generally are not rich enough to buy ACs or Coolers.

Recently a petition was filed in the High Court in Kerala seeking a change in the dress code of lawyers – because “the black coat, a relic of the Raj, is unsuitable for the sweltering Indian climate”.

The judgment

The judge wrote in his judgement, “This noble profession of a lawyer swears by sweat. The smell of sweat, however bad always reminds us of the dedication and hard work this age old and noble profession demands”.

 “Law is a jealous mistress, but she has always tolerated sweaty armpits”, said the judge calling for room fresheners, simultaneously.

Wife’s response

When our reporter tried to talk to the wife on phone, her voice sounded very nasal. On enquiry we found that she generally had her nose pinned with a clothes-pin and even her children, Sweaty and Badboo had the same.

When asked whether her husband uses deodorants she said, “Yes. He gets them for free as has been recently selected by the Set Wet Company as a model for experimenting on how their products can prevent sweat and smell in such extreme conditions”.

Role of BCI

Mr. Barrier of Bar Council of India has told us that the Bar Council of India is taking appropriate steps to get rid of this situation. “We are aware of the situation”, he said with a quenched nose.

He added, “We are going to offer free ‘waxing’ facilities for our male lawyers. Body hair is one of the causes of such situations getting worsened”.

“Also, in the bar exam along with name, date of birth, sex etc. we’ll have a ‘sweat condition’ column. The options range from below normal to highly vulnerable. We’ll identify people who need medical help and can allow them some leverage in the dress code”, he said.

Client’s response

However many of the clients of leading litigators say that the smell helps them as they can tell how well prepared the lawyer is just by the strength of the smell he/she emanates.

“I don’t even have to go inside my lawyer’s chamber. I can feel the aura, I mean smell it even outside his office when he is especially confident about a case”, said Mr. A. Sharma client of Advocate B. Verma.

Sex and smell

 “Now that the judgment has been delivered, I must tell you that my husband is otherwise very very sexy”, said the wife, sounding excited.

“But on numerous occasion he has virtually set himself wet and bathed in the deo, but with no smellable results”, she adds, sniffing the air around her.

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