DISCLAIMER: What I’m about to say will probably upset a lot of people because it will burst their bubble, but I wanted to know what the broader LI community thinks.
Working long hours in law firms is not easy. Often times you have to stay up at night, sleep for very few hours just to complete a deliverable, sacrifice various social events due to the job. People are willing to put up with this in exchange for the big salary. But I wanted to understand the attitude of people - as to how they view these everyday sacrifices.
I’ve broadly seen 3 responses to this. (I’m paraphrasing)
1. The nicer, introverted bunch - yes it’s painful, but after work ends, we get to do things which bring us joy
2. The slightly aggressive/ tough guy type people - Yeah, it’s difficult, but this is what the job is. This is what life is.
3. The senior senior people a work - the struggle is essential and we’ve been through it too. You’ll get lots of learning and you should embrace it.
In the above scenario, I was thinking - if we replace the idea of struggle/ pain with a person who regularly slaps you and causes you pain, this is what the relationship would probably look like:
Question - “So why are you in the relationship if he slaps you everyday? Isn’t that toxic?”
Type 1 - Introvert /timid type person -
Yes, he slaps me every day, but he isn’t toxic. Because you see, at the end of every month, he buys me a Birkin bag, and always treats me to a 5 star restaurant. And he buys me face cream to cover all the scars due to the slaps. Once you tolerate the slaps, and you get to know him, he is actually a nice person.
Type 2 - The tough guys -
Yeah. He slaps me, but I’m a tough guy and I can withstand the pressure. I’m not the one to cry. I am not beating him up cos he has contacts. Anyway, it doesn’t matter because at the end of the month I grab beer with my bros and we get ourselves piss drunk. So we forget whatever happened last month. His slap allows me to pay for my beer.
Type 3: Senior senior:
The slap? Oh yeah, that’s actually good for you. In fact I look forward to getting slapped everyday. You see, when I wake up, I feel drowsy, but with just one tight slap on my face, I’m completely awake. Helps me to come to my senses. Oh, and you see this chiseled jawline I have? That’s because of all the times I’ve been slapped over the years. Trust me it’s good for you.
______________
I know this is a very unconventional way of thinking, and this could probably have been explained in a better way, but you get the point right? What are your views on this?
It is not an unconventional way of thinking. It is a stupid way of thinking. Domestic violence is not comparable to going through a busy period at work. News Flash: Everyone before and after you has worked. It is not some terrible thing that is happening only to you. Work is not pain and it is not suffering. If you don't want to work- go be a hippie somewhere man. What is stopping you? The idea that people have to pay you money though without you working- thats wild. You are not entitled to a salary when you don't turn in deliverables and don't do your job. This is a transaction- that is all. Dont turn it into a relationship that it is not. You won't get fired if you do your job every day and leave at a reasonable hour. If you don't do your job though- then yeah you'll have to stay later and later to get things done. Go finish your work and stop wasting time posting this nonsense on this site, checking instagram, and taking smoke breaks. Get done early, go home. Fin.
What you refused to consider is that people have responsibilities and obligations. To mock them because of that is moronic. I work in a firm because I have bills to pay and old parents to take care of. The money makes my life easier and I am scared of abandoning that and unwilling to take the risk. Yes, firms are not the perfect places to be in but the truth is most places aren't. The money is good, the work is alright and I have gotten habituated with it. Here, that's your answer.
Appreciate your perspective. But maybe you missed my point.
I’m not saying you shouldn’t work hard to make a living. I’m asking which person needs 20 lakhs bonus to take care of their parents? Are we so obsessed with money, we are ready to put up with everything and even run our health into the ground?
Someone above commented that if I do my work on time, I’ll get to go home on time. Apparently, if I don’t do my job, I’ll have to stay back late. But here’s the difference about work in law firms - it’s not a “syllabus” you can just complete if you worker harder. Work is like a bottomless pit which never ends. No one would care if you end up dead trying to go down that pit.
Are all of us corp lawyers willing to put up with all the stress and all nighters just because we are locked in our golden handcuffs? Or is there something else I’m missing?
Work is a bottomless pit - but manage it like an adult. Organise things by priority. Stagger your deadlines. Set a reasonable goal for what you will get done everyday and get it done as quickly as possible and then go do whatever you want. Employers are not fools. They know a hard/ smart worker when they see one and someone who is just hanging around till late hours hoping to give the impression that they’re doing work when really they’re just messing around. Have clear goal oriented conversations with your supervisor about what is expected. Be an adult about it. No one is going to create work life balance and present it on a platter. You have to be self possessed enough to think carefully about your goals and act on them.
Hands down I agree with you. Having worked at one of such places where the only good thing was my pay check, I have ruined my health and mental peace. WORK NEVER ENDS. The dreaded calls on Sundays and emails post 12:00am for some "urgent deliverable" are traumatic. Trust me, in all these months when I have delivered these so called deliverables, NONE, absolutely NONE were worth sacrificing my sleep and messing up my meal schedules.
My senior who happily shoved work, was herself a lonely pschco, who would work from morning 8:00 am to 2:00am and had nothing better going for her in life
Working long hours in law firms is not easy. Often times you have to stay up at night, sleep for very few hours just to complete a deliverable, sacrifice various social events due to the job. People are willing to put up with this in exchange for the big salary. But I wanted to understand the attitude of people - as to how they view these everyday sacrifices.
I’ve broadly seen 3 responses to this. (I’m paraphrasing)
1. The nicer, introverted bunch - yes it’s painful, but after work ends, we get to do things which bring us joy
2. The slightly aggressive/ tough guy type people - Yeah, it’s difficult, but this is what the job is. This is what life is.
3. The senior senior people a work - the struggle is essential and we’ve been through it too. You’ll get lots of learning and you should embrace it.
In the above scenario, I was thinking - if we replace the idea of struggle/ pain with a person who regularly slaps you and causes you pain, this is what the relationship would probably look like:
Question - “So why are you in the relationship if he slaps you everyday? Isn’t that toxic?”
Type 1 - Introvert /timid type person -
Yes, he slaps me every day, but he isn’t toxic. Because you see, at the end of every month, he buys me a Birkin bag, and always treats me to a 5 star restaurant. And he buys me face cream to cover all the scars due to the slaps. Once you tolerate the slaps, and you get to know him, he is actually a nice person.
Type 2 - The tough guys -
Yeah. He slaps me, but I’m a tough guy and I can withstand the pressure. I’m not the one to cry. I am not beating him up cos he has contacts. Anyway, it doesn’t matter because at the end of the month I grab beer with my bros and we get ourselves piss drunk. So we forget whatever happened last month. His slap allows me to pay for my beer.
Type 3: Senior senior:
The slap? Oh yeah, that’s actually good for you. In fact I look forward to getting slapped everyday. You see, when I wake up, I feel drowsy, but with just one tight slap on my face, I’m completely awake. Helps me to come to my senses. Oh, and you see this chiseled jawline I have? That’s because of all the times I’ve been slapped over the years. Trust me it’s good for you.
______________
I know this is a very unconventional way of thinking, and this could probably have been explained in a better way, but you get the point right? What are your views on this?
I’m not saying you shouldn’t work hard to make a living. I’m asking which person needs 20 lakhs bonus to take care of their parents? Are we so obsessed with money, we are ready to put up with everything and even run our health into the ground?
Someone above commented that if I do my work on time, I’ll get to go home on time. Apparently, if I don’t do my job, I’ll have to stay back late. But here’s the difference about work in law firms - it’s not a “syllabus” you can just complete if you worker harder. Work is like a bottomless pit which never ends. No one would care if you end up dead trying to go down that pit.
Are all of us corp lawyers willing to put up with all the stress and all nighters just because we are locked in our golden handcuffs? Or is there something else I’m missing?
My senior who happily shoved work, was herself a lonely pschco, who would work from morning 8:00 am to 2:00am and had nothing better going for her in life