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India Today, Outlook Come With Law College Rankings: NLSIU First, Rest Jumbled


New Delhi

India Today and Outlook have published their annual rankings of colleges accross India. Among law schools, NLSIU is placed first in both the rankings. India Today placed NALSAR at second while Outlook placed NUJS in that position. We have painstackingly managed time to explain the hotch-potch of rankings after that.

India Today’s representative when asked about the difference between rankings of itself and Outlook answered, “See during our first year we were unaware what NUJS was till one of the boss’s kids told him that this national law school has opened in Kolkata”.

“In the second year we were driven away by some Bong faculty. Its only after that year, that NUJS featured in our rankings. Hence we can only  slowly move up its rank so that we maintain a sort of consistency with our previous years’ rankings”.

Delhi University is placed third by India Today while Outlook has NALSAR in the position. An Outlook’s representative explained, “See, we have copy catted India Today. So we try to be different from them. Hence we placed NALSAR at third, just to sound different you know”.

“For the top three we have three slips NLSIU, NALSAR and NUJS. Our boss picks up a slip and our researchers write down the name of whatever name comes up”, said the lead researcher of Outlook, Mrs. Bahari Dekha explaining Outlook’s rigorous methodology.

“For the 4th and the 5th slot we have chits of NLIU Bhopal, NLU Jodhpur, ILS Pune and Delhi University. A similar process is followed and afterwards, chit picking becomes too slow and tedious. So we just pick and choose a cooler sounding law college”, she added.

“In short it is first chit picking and then pick picking. There is no nit-picking”, she explained.

We asked India Today’s boss Bharat Aaj about the experts his team had consulted: “Our team in itself is an expert. We have pioneered the rankings. We are the experts. And more importantly students believe us. Don’t tell me we should consult anyone else”.

Our next question to Mr. Aaj was whether his team visited the law schools: “See we did not visit Bangalore because we had pre-decided their rank. NALSAR told us that they would put up an advertisement and so we gave it a skip. We did not visit NUJS as that day was a bandh in Kolkata. Jodhpur was way too hot. And who’ll visit a place like Bhopal”?, he answered.

“We visited Amity Law School, though. It is right next door. We were treated to a dinner and great drinks, as always. They also have a front page advertisement and we have mutual respect for them”, he added. Amity is ranked 10 in India today rankings and has remain unmoved in that position.

Ankit, a 17 year old student law aspirant who was seen carrying all the issues spoke to FNWB: “I buy the magazine to see some hot college chicks and generally see what the cool dudes are upto, as far as trends and all is concerned”.

 If you are worried about your college ranks, the legal horoscope might be of help.

Comments

  • Guest
    Anonymous guest Monday, 7 Jun 10

    Legally Atrocious

    Haha good one! Humorous but reveals the truth behind college rankings given by Outlook and India Today. Unreliable and biased, to some extent.

  • False News With Balls
    False News With Balls Monday, 7 Jun 10

    Thanks atrocious. I made a conscious attempt to tone down the humour part and increase the satire bit. (Many readers don't share my idiosyncratic sense of humour).

  • Guest
    Anonymous guest Tuesday, 8 Jun 10

    Yash

    Great article :).

    Balls isn't that subtle in this article, so anyone who can't figure out what he's trying to talk about, or why he has written this and taken up LI's blogspace, should read it again, if that doesnt work, read the tags, then read the article again.

    Cheers

  • False News With Balls
    False News With Balls Tuesday, 8 Jun 10

    Thanks a ton Yash! A request: why don't you register yourself on LegallyIndia?

  • Guest
    Anonymous guest Tuesday, 8 Jun 10

    Fun Loving Guy

    Nice one. however disappointed to see u reduced ur great sense of humour. this is not TRUE FNWB. change ur cloths once again.

  • False News With Balls
    False News With Balls Tuesday, 8 Jun 10

    Sure Fun Loving Guy. I will come back to my true Avatar soon. But then you and Yash will have to defend me (a routine now). Ha!

  • Guest
    Anonymous guest Tuesday, 8 Jun 10

    HA HA.....Gud one!!Loved it......

  • Guest
    Anonymous guest Tuesday, 8 Jun 10

    hilarious and hard hitting!

  • Guest
    Anonymous guest Tuesday, 8 Jun 10

    Priya

    nice one... because of these articles and rankings students have to go through lots of trouble and torture.... (m talking about preference list and upgaradation..)

  • False News With Balls
    False News With Balls Tuesday, 8 Jun 10

    Trouble and torture? Ask me. :)

  • Guest
    Anonymous guest Wednesday, 9 Jun 10

    This is fantastic writing false news. Actually waht you have said about NUJS is true!!! Even BITS, pilani one of the best engineering colleges doen't allow india today to come to their comapus.

  • sagnik
    sagnik Friday, 11 Jun 10

    awesome..i'll go to the extent of saying that this is the best blog i've read so far in legallyindia..no offence to legal poet

  • False News With Balls
    False News With Balls Friday, 11 Jun 10

    Thanks sagnik. And legalpoet won't be sad one little bit. Ha!

  • Guest
    Anonymous guest Sunday, 13 Jun 10

    this is ridiculous their method of ranking..if the quoutes r to be right..dese guys noe absolutely nothing abt law schools and are damn ignorant and is misleading the future law students..smething ought to be done abt it..

  • Guest
    Anonymous guest Tuesday, 22 Jun 10

    @ India Today: What were you thinking

  • namitjain90
    namitjain90 Friday, 25 Jun 10

    Excellent post, I wonder if they actually follow a method similar to this!!!

  • Guest
    Anonymous guest Friday, 25 Jun 10

    nice one :)

    sadly what you have written is so true..I remember a time when I too went through these and was all confused cause the rankings were different for each magazine! But I like the way you put it and I have a feeling this is exactly how it works!!

  • Guest
    Anonymous guest Saturday, 12 Feb 11

    Anonymous/ Has Symbiosis further lost its rankings??

    Wonder why should Symbiosis-Pune should be downgraded against ILS-Pune?? Except for
    its heritage their concerns on quality education / mooting / participation into various activities are extremely poor..You are certainly on your own for achieving xtra miles through this college..

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